We Should Develop A Friendship With Our Spouses

The Holy Prophet (saws) said ; "The most perfect believer in faith is the one whose character is finest and who is kindest to his wife."

[Tirmidhi & Nasa'i]

Explanation : We should develop a friendship with our spouses. The relationship based on friendship is more able to withstand outside pressures. We honor, trust, respect, accept and care for our friends , in spite of our differences. These are the aspects of friendship we should bring to our marriages.

Unfortunately the only aspect that people think of bringing to their marriage which is highly inappropriate is the buddy scenario . Shariah (Islamic law) has placed the husband in a leadership role within a family. This requires a certain decorum , which cannot be maintained if the spouses consider each other as pals.

This should not be taken to mean that the husband is a dictator but a shepherd who is responsible for and to his flock. This is a position of grave responsibility and places an enormous burden on the husband. Furthermore the children need to see their parents as friends but not as pals as this encourages disrespect.

One can Supplicate & Wish Well for a Non-Muslim...

Anas (ra) relates that a Jewish boy used to attend Prophet (saws). Once he fell sick and the Prophet (saws) went to visit him and asked him to embrace Islam. The boy looked at his father, who said to obey what the Prophet (saws) had advised. Prophet (saws) said : "Thanks to Allah (Swt), Who saved the boy from Hell fire."

[Bukhari]

Explanation : Islamic Jurisprudence, Traditions of Prophet (saws) , and history have a treasure of information and guidance about relations of Muslims with non-Muslims . Interpersonal relations, social interaction , trade or business partnership , and all other aspects of social interdependence have been discussed and clarified. Due respect is to be given to non-Muslims according to their status and rank . Islam does not teavh hatred, bias, prejudice and discrimination against non-Muslims.

In fact the life of the Prophet (saws) , and his companions (Allah be pleased with them) teaches us to be extra careful for their feelings and always make efforts to make a soft corner in their hearts by good behaviour and a positive winning attitude. The Arabic term Taaleef-e-Qalb defines this effort. This effort has brought millions to the fold of Islam. It was not the sword, but the character and knowledge that triumphed.

None forced Islam on anyone, but the entire poulation embraced Islam after Prophet (saws)'s return to Makkah as mentioned in Ayah 2 of Surah An-Nasr in the Holy Qur'an : "( Rasool Allah) , when you see people embracing Allah's faith in large crowds, celebrate the praise of your Lord and ask His forgiveness."

One can supplicate and wish well for a non-Muslim according to the situation he may be in . This is again a display of courtesy, kind heartedness and mutual respect taught by Islam.

We Should Not Waste Any Moment of our Life in Gossips

The Prophet (saws) said, "There are two blessings that most people are deluded by. Health and available time."

[Bukhari]

Explanation : In personal life, companions of the Prophet (saws) used to spend a lot more time in worship than we do. This would seem to leave a lot less time for other pursuits in life. We also know that means of communications were very poor at that time. Sometimes they (sahaba) had to travel on horseback for weeks or months to another area, say, to collect a report of a hadith from someone who had heard it directly from the Prophet (saws). Yet during this period and despite all the logistics problems, together they collected the hundreds of thousands of Ahadith . How in the world did they find time for that ?

The answer is simple . They (sahaba) valued time as the gift whose proper or improper use would determine the outcome for the eternity. Abdullah ibn Hasan(ra) reports that whenever two companions met, they would not depart till they had recited Surah Al-Asr to each other reminding themselves of the eternal loss everyone faces if we waste our time in foolish pursuits . They did not waste any moment of their life in gossips, useless talks or meaningless pursuits.

We are becoming older every day.One day our time will be up and we will leave the world forever.What happens afterwards depends solely on how we used all the moments available to us before that certain but unknown moment comes.